Taking Control

Taking control.  It sounds easy, right?  I've been struggling with my weight since I turned 20, and it has gone nowhere but up.  In the past 7 years I have gotten married, and had 2 children.  On May 5th I turned 30.  I'm tired of being fat and feeling frumpy.  I want my husband to be proud of me, I want my kids to adore me.  I want to be me.  The old skinny me.  I have a lot of food related demons that I have to overcome and I'm starting to realize what they are.  I constantly sabotage every diet I am on and I'm tired of it.  I know it's going to be hard, but it's also going to be worth it.  My first goal is to get down to my wedding weight.  I have 18 pounds to go.  Being pregnant with my 2nd child, I got to my highest weight ever.  I have since shed 33 pounds.  I am fortunate that I don't gain a ton of weight when pregnant.  With my first child, I gained 19 pounds and my second, I gained 26.  I am on the right path, I just have to keep it up and stay motivated.  I feel that writing this blog will hold me accountable, even if no one reads it!  I will stay accountable to myself, and that is my main struggle.  I am addicted to Pepsi.  No joke.  I used to go days just drinking Pepsi, no water, no juice, no nothing, just Pepsi.  I have realized how bad that is for you, and I now limit myself to 1 Pepsi at most per day.  If I do have one, it's usually with breakfast, it's like my coffee.  I know it's awful but I'm struggling to give up that one soda!  I like to eat.  I like food.  I like being full.  I am going to work on giving up processed sugar, fast food, soda and learn portion control.  I have tried Weight Watchers, I have tried counting calories, I have tried Atkins, the South Beach Diet and many, many others.  I'm not ashamed to say that I have even tried diet pills.  I have come to realize that there is no miracle pill or diet that will work for me, just plain old eating right and exercise.  I am ready.  I'm taking control.